Subtle signs that you’re settling for less than you should

Relationship
3 signs you’re settling for less than you should

Have you ever heard the sentence: If the relationship is right for you, you just feel it? The opposite is actually much more important: If a partnership does not satisfy you, then you know it intuitively – maybe you just don’t want to admit it. However, there are relatively clear signs that will let you know that your relationship is not right for you and that you should not settle for it.

These warning signs suggest that you’re settling for less than you should

1. You and your partner don’t want the same thing

There are an infinite number of different relationship models – these include a couple relationship with children, a relationship for two, a partnership with separate households, a polyamorous relationship with more than two people. No option is better or worse than the other. The only important thing is that you and your partner agree and have similar needs within the relationship.

Of course, this means the overarching relationship and life model, but also, for example, the need for closeness and time together. How do you imagine the future? What is important to you? You should have similar ideas on these rough points so that the relationship has a chance in the long term. If you know you have different plans in life, but you’d rather continue the relationship than be alone, that should be a warning sign.

2. You can’t be yourself

We want to be loved for ourselves – with all our good and bad qualities. If you feel like you have to pretend to your partner and hide certain parts of your personality or opinions in order to be accepted, then that’s not a good sign. Conflicts are part of a relationship, and of course we are annoyed by our sweetheart – or he is annoyed by us. But if we don’t fit together fundamentally as human beings and one side can’t really be itself, then something has gone wrong.

3. You’re somewhat avoiding the relationship

Ideally, we are with a person because we believe they are the best possible partner for us and make our lives better. In truth, however, other reasons often also play a role in the choice of partner and in the fundamental decision for a relationship. Many people are afraid of being alone and would rather get involved in a mediocre partnership than go through life solo. Or they’ve been severely hurt or suffered some other trauma — and because they don’t want to feel the negative emotions, they run away from them and rush straight into a relationship.

Unfortunately, such constellations often lead to us getting involved with partners who do not really suit us. You may also catch yourself thinking that the main reason your relationship exists is because you are afraid of the alternative. This can be a definite red flag that you’re not dating someone who’s really good for you.

Warning: there is no such thing as a perfect relationship

Of course, this does not mean that every partnership in which everything is not 100 percent perfect is wrong. There are always aspects of our partner that we dislike and issues that harbor the potential for conflict. But at the core you should fit together and have similar or at least compatible values ​​and needs. And if you’re honest with yourself, you probably know deep down if that’s the case in your relationship.

Sources used: gedankenwelt.de, yourtango.com, psychologytoday.com

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Bridget