Although the conversation about mental health is becoming more present in our society, we still often talk about therapy behind closed doors. Coach and therapist Andrea vorm Walde wants to break the taboo and explains to us why it is so important to normalize psychological counseling.
It’s a topic that people like to avoid: psychotherapy. The shame of making public that something is mentally stressing us so much that we have to seek help from an outsider is often too great. Conversations with trained therapists are important and correct in order to process things in our lives. Counselor Andrea vorm Walde also hopes that inhibitions will decrease and more people will go to therapy.
Guido: Do you have the feeling that more people are daring to start therapy?
Andrea vorm Walde: In fact, I have had more and more inquiries in my practice for a few weeks, and my colleagues confirm that. The inquiries had increased more and more during the Corona pandemic anyway – especially from men and women, by the way 30 – but now it’s going to be significantly more. The assumption that the current issues that determine our lives make a significant contribution to this is obvious. The news situation, especially with regard to the war in Europe, which is very close to us, but also with regard to the climate catastrophe, is now overwhelming for many because they are no longer at full strength anyway. After the last two years, which were determined by Corona and brought many restrictions that they could hardly bear, it’s no wonder. At some point “the soul overflows”.
And how is the attitude changing in general? Can you say publicly: Yes, I’m going to therapy?
Yes, the view of psychotherapy has definitely improved over the years or decades. The shame of needing help has, thank God, lessened a little, even if it is still not as dispelled as would be desirable.
Many people find it helpful to ask for coaching first, and that’s not entirely wrong. Strictly speaking, it is only really a psychotherapy when the symptoms have an illness value. Ideally, you get support beforehand and then the inhibition threshold drops significantly and the step becomes easier for more and more people. The fact that more and more manage to do this even when the bad situation is already advanced is a really good development! If we have back pain or physical injuries, we go to physiotherapy.
Why is it still not possible to do psychotherapy with the same naturalness when the heart hurts and the soul needs help?
In your opinion, what else needs to happen for psychotherapy to gain even greater acceptance?
I think it always takes different approaches from different sides before measures become more established. This would include, for example, doctors recommending therapies as a matter of course if they have patients who are mentally stressed. And even before the symptoms have reached extreme proportions.
Being able to go to therapy needs to get easier
Do you think doing therapy will make it harder for us?
It would be so important that there were more health insurance fund approved therapists. With a waiting period of almost a year – as it is in Hamburg at the moment – far too many people give up because the search is counterproductive for their condition.
But how do you manage to keep going?
Of course, what really helps is to remember “I’m not alone in this”. For me, the media are also asked about that. So you are already contributing to it. And what is increasing and certainly a positive sign is that more and more celebrities are going public with their psychological stress and therapies. I’m thinking of Max Eberl, the manager of Borussia Mönchengladbach, or of Kurt Krömer with his book – and those are just two of many cases. This of course encourages many and is a step in a good direction.
Above all, however, it is important how we deal with it ourselves when we have such situations in our immediate environment. For example, when I hear a father of a teenage boy talk about his son’s girlfriend being “in the loop,” I can only shake my head. Because under certain circumstances this will mean that his own child will not dare to open up if he is feeling bad himself. We all must finally understand psychotherapy as a completely normal treatment and mental difficulties as not more ‘reprehensible’ than a broken leg.
When is a good time to start therapy? Are there “traits” about yourself?
The best time for therapy is BEFORE the illness. Just as exercise helps us to avoid various physical illnesses, so does the positive and resource-oriented occupation with ourselves for the soul.
How do I find out if I need therapy?
We need to take signs more seriously, such as not taking sleep disorders lightly. Longer lasting listless phases and a sad mood are, for example, clear signs of a possible impending depression, which is much more difficult to treat once it has already manifested itself.
Are there physical signs we should listen to?
Yes. Many physical problems that do not have a clear diagnosis can also be improved with psychotherapy: back pain, migraines, stomach problems – to name just a few. The same applies to cognitive losses, for example difficulty concentrating, brooding, lack of clarity in thoughts.
And basically we have to realize that we don’t have to be able to deal with every low blow in life on our own. Separations, deaths in a close environment, serious illness, job loss, changes such as the birth of a child or moving out – these are just a few situations that not everyone can put up with. However, with support they can be mastered well and can even lead to positive personal development and a great enrichment in life.
Thank you for the interview, dear Andrea!
Andrea vorm Walde is a psychological consultant in Hamburg, andreavormwalde.de