I don't really talk about sex. I don't think it matters to anyone what my husband and I do in the sheets or wherever. Or maybe not. But for the benefit of mankind, I would like to comment on the topic here. Because I think that everyone always thinks that the others always have more sex than they do. Probably because everyone is like me – and doesn't want to talk about it as much.
When should I watch series on Netflix?
When I had one or two gin and tonic too much the other night, I broke the silence, contrary to my habit. It was about Heidi Klum and that, if you trust her Instagram account, you can only be seen in bed or kissing somewhere else with your young lover Tom Kaulitz. Then it bubbled out of me: "Are they never tired? That would be too much for me. How can they do it?"
I did not expect the emotional outbreak that followed. "Thank you for saying that. I was afraid that is only the case with us," my friend Katharina called out, relieved. Sandra almost shouted: "I can tell you. Finally. I can't remember the last time." I like this: "I also wonder how it should go more than once a week, at some point you have to sleep, work and do the housekeeping. And then there are always the kids who want something. Apart from that I want to watch series on Netflix. "
Unlike Heidi K., by the way, our potential sex partners are all over 40. In addition, all the protagonists of the conversation are neither newly in love, nor under 30. On the contrary: We have known our men for more than ten years and are over 40. Only once for explanation…
After 10 p.m. That's too late!
In any case, there was a lively discussion that evening, which was wonderfully honest. Little by little, each of the five people present revealed that there was far less sex in their long-term relationships than five or ten years ago. Or in front of the children. And that you couldn't imagine it any other way. The remarkable thing was: Nobody thought that was particularly bad, just thought it HAS to be anymore. Because that's the way it is – and everyone else has more.
According to a survey by the Kinsey Institute, whose scientists at the University of Indiana do research on sexuality and partnership, 34 percent of married couples are said to have GV at least twice a week, 45 percent a couple of times a month, and about 13 percent a couple of times a year. Personally, I think it's pretty great twice a week, which sounds like wild sex life to me. Incidentally, the highlight of my conversation with the friends was when Katja noticed that her husband already knew that after 10 p.m. he would no longer have to make any inquiries – that was far too late for her.
Honestly, it's a lie!
By the way, it's not just women who always pretend migraines. Sometimes men don't feel like it either. Of course, this has to do with stressful living conditions – and with age: According to the survey, the 30- to 39-year-olds have sex on average 1.65 times a week. The 40- to 49-year-olds, on the other hand, only act on average 1.33 times a week. At this point I would like to say that I do not trust these numbers anyway. They lie, just like the men's salaries and children's grades. It's like giving a stranger honest information about such intimate things!
I am sure, however, that my friends sincerely said that evening how it was going with them. That sounded more like twice a month – and that's perfectly okay. Everyone has children, everyone has jobs, everyone has friends, a hobby and a Netflix or Amazon Prime subscription. When should you still have sex?
By the way, this conversation will be interesting again in ten years. When the children are older or out of the house and we are not all that tired anymore. Until then, however, I no longer believe anyone has sex more than once a week – unless it's Heidi Klum or a porn actress who claims it. Everyone can tell a lot.