Tips for relatives and friends with depression

Friends and family members of depressed people play an important role on the way to a normal life. Daily support is extremely helpful in treatment.

A good and trusting relationship between family members and friends of people with depression is very helpful for both parties.
© iStockphoto.com/shironosov

Relatives can play an important role in dealing with the depression as well as in the recovery process for a partner, relative, or friend suffering from depression. However, you should be aware that the treatment and healing process takes time. Recovery cannot take place overnight. It is therefore important to be patient.

A depressed person needs attention, but must not be pressured. It is therefore important not to withdraw from the person affected, but to speak openly with one another. Maintaining a good and trusting relationship is particularly important in such a crisis phase.

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Relatives help with depression

The following tips can help family members and friends support someone with depression:

  • Orientation in everyday life: Depressed people find it difficult to pull themselves up to something. Help your partner or relatives to structure the daily routine and to bring a certain order and structure into everyday life.

  • Support Your partner or friend very specifically in everyday life. For example, you can help him with activities and obligations that he is currently unable to take on on his own due to the illness, or accompany him to visit the doctor or therapist. But avoid patronizing or restricting him and don't make decisions behind his back.

  • Motivate: Try to get the person involved in smaller activities, such as going for a walk.

  • Empower Show him in everything positive he does or says.

  • Refrain from reproach or advice: Sentences like “Don't get in line!”, “You just have to make an effort! or "Isn't everything half as bad" do not help depressed people.

  • Encourage therapy: If left untreated, depression can become chronic. Shame to see a doctor or therapist is understandable, but unnecessary. Therefore, encourage the partner or friend to seek professional help. Talk to him about the benefits of treatment.

  • Try Understanding, courage and hope to convey. However, excessive optimism seems implausible.

  • Get active yourself: Friends in particular should keep in touch and suggest things to do together. Depression often means that the person affected cannot muster the necessary energy to call or suggest a joint venture. This does not express disinterest in you or the desire to be left alone.

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Relatives should not neglect their own needs

The depression of the partner, friend or family member also changes one's everyday life. It is important not to neglect your own needs.

Depression is a serious and at times grueling disease that not only leaves traces of exhaustion and tension in the person affected. Your own energy balance also suffers from the stress that depression brings with it.

There is no place for a bad conscience

In addition to worrying about those affected, there is soon also the desire to find time for yourself in between and be able to breathe a little deeply. Such thoughts and needs may be frightening and trigger fears of neglecting the person concerned, abandoning them or being selfish. Taking responsibility for yourself does not mean, however, to steal from responsibility in any way or to leave your partner or friend out in the rain. It's not about having to choose between your own well-being and the well-being of the depressed person. Neither the depressed person nor you benefit from it if you do not allow yourself to seek relief and encouragement.

Tips for relatives

It is important that loved ones not neglect themselves. The following tips will help you to find a constructive way of dealing with the stresses associated with the depression of someone close to you:

  • Don't overwhelm: They can help the person affected in many ways – up to certain limits. Be careful not to become a substitute therapist. It is not your job.

  • Maintain your own health: It is important to wipe out the worry and mindfulness for the depressed person and the responsibility towards yourself and your own health to act in a balanced way.

  • Find someone you trust: Do not deal with everything on your own, do not devour your worries and needs. Exchanging ideas and using your own social network can be an important support.

  • Regain strength: You are not endlessly resilient either. To pause is a legitimate need that you can admit to yourself.

  • Don't let your own interests and activities slip: Meet up with friends, read a book, pursue your hobbies, and do something. From this you can gain strength and courage, which can also help the depressed.

The information should enable you to boldly and confidently find a balance between responsibility for the sick person and mindfulness for yourself. This is the best and most helpful way for everyone involved to gain strength and courage to deal with depression together collect.

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