Being able to empathize with others is actually a good quality. But too much empathy can be harmful. You will now find out how to recognize excess.
Hyper-empathy syndrome: Too much empathy
Empathy describes the ability to get into the Thinking into another's emotional world to be able to. Without empathy, social coexistence as we know it would only work with great difficulty. We feel when it is appropriate to address critical issues and when it is better to keep your mouth shut. Empathetic people perceive when fellow human beings need help and take care not to harm others.
Consideration, respect or helpfulness are based on a healthy level of empathy. Not only see yourself, but also thinking about others – this is absolutely essential for relationships of any kind.
The level of empathy is innate, but can be influenced in the course of life. People who cannot feel compassion often develop personality disorders such as psychopathy or clinically diagnosable narcissism.
Too little empathy harms us and our togetherness, no question about it. But how is it actually with too much empathy out? That too can be harmful and present us with many challenges. Scientists also refer to excessive compassion as "Hyper-Empathy Syndrome", which is often associated with high sensitivity. The following four points suggest that your empathy is a little too strong.
1. Saying no is rare
Hello, overwhelmed! Too much empathy makes us feel ourselves neck more than we can really handle. We recognize the stress of our counterpart and want to help. But then we see our own stress far too late. We lose ourselves in the needs of others – and that is unhealthy in the long run.
In the end we thought of everyone else in an exemplary way and completely lost ourselves in the process. Don't forget: sometimes one means No for others a yes to yourself. Protect yourself from excessive demands and stress by drawing boundaries. Then you also have more power to be there for others.
Learn more ways to reduce stress here.
2. Too much empathy: Critical words are difficult
A friend tells you about what felt like the eighth attempt at a relationship with a difficult ex. You feel their pain, you see their hope. So when she asks you for your opinion, you react understandingly and say yes to the emotional roller coaster ride. After all, you wish so badly for her that it worked out this time.
Those who are very empathic, however, miss moments in which critical words would be appropriate. We agree with others too quicklybecause we don't want to offend them. Who wants to be the bogeyman who does something bad?
Of course we don't want to offend or make anyone unhappy. However, a good friend sometimes dares to criticize decisions and the BFF not to let run blindly to perdition. Opposition is uncomfortable at first, but can have a lot of positive effects in the long term!
Here we show you how criticism can be successful without being hurtful.
3. Problems are taken over
As a very empathic person do you feel what your counterpart is feeling. A beautiful gift that speaks for your considerate nature. Too much empathy, however, also brings with it a difficulty: You not only feel the good emotions of others, but take their negativity with you too. Your emotions are your emotions. Your problems are your problems. And so an actually good day can turn over quickly. As the word pity already suggests: You suffer too!
One call where you hear of bad news from a loved one is enough and the Mood sinks into the basement. That can be exhausting: In addition to our own problems, we then also feel responsible for conflicts from others. Exhausting!
If we are too empathetic, we often lack the necessary one emotional distance to others. However, this is important to protect your own well-being and the appropriate help to offer.
4. Forgive too quickly
"Oh, she definitely didn't mean that!" A typical sentence that we must all have said or thought before. Forgiving being is an absolutely positive quality. At some point you have to let go of the ballast and move on!
Extremely empathic people forgive a little too quickly. Instead of allowing hurt feelings, they are suppressed. That harbors the danger in unhealthy relationships get stuck with your own Self worth damage. We let ourselves liked too much and give in too quickly. Those who want to become happier and more confident should stand by their (hurt) feelings. Forgiving too quickly is a typical sign of hyper-empathy syndrome.
Did you recognize yourself at one point or another? In the daily stress of everyday life, do not forget to take care of yourself and not lose yourself in empathy for your fellow human beings.
You can find many more tips in our BRIGITTE Community!