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Why are household and family management still considered "women's affairs"? As much as society has changed in the last few decades: Far too often in families all household tasks are tacitly passed on to the mother. Why is that? The French comic artist "Emma" took a closer look at the phenomenon – with her permission we are showing you our German translation.
The men mean well, but …
The crazy thing is: Men even now mostly want to contribute equally to the household. Gone are the days when men looked disparagingly at the "mother's jobs" – basically they see themselves as equal partners who lend a hand. The real problem is often that while they actually divide all tasks 50-50 in their own perception, the reality is unfortunately very different.
The curse of the "mental burden"
The mean thing is that many men just don't realize what they are giving their wives to responsibility for. Everyday life just runs like clockwork – you only notice how much your partner actually has to do in the background when you have to take over the entire household and family yourself (e.g. due to the mother's prolonged illness). Draftsman Emma calls the phenomenon the "mental burden": at the same time being a kind of "project manager" for the family, who has to carry out every single task herself.
"Why didn't you say anything?"
And so it happens that many women never rest and have to keep a complex logistics in mind – even when they are actually "off work". The men do not notice anything – and when the situation escalates, they ask in surprise: "Why didn't you ask me for help?" It simply does not occur to them that they have to think for themselves and also have to take action without being asked. Blogger "dasnuf" once shared a list that couples can use to quickly determine how dire they are.
Encouragement from all over the world
Since its release in 2017, the cartoonist Emma has received enthusiastic reactions worldwide for her comic – also from men who previously thought themselves helpful and suddenly experienced a completely new perspective. In addition to her webcomic, Emma has also published two books – unfortunately only in French so far.