Why you’ll always suck at wine

1. Because you don’t know how to prioritize

On my (messy) desk is a pretty bottle of wine that perfectly illustrates the reason for this assertion. The label is modern, with a gold circle on a navy blue background. The name of the cuvée spreads out broadly, attractively: Agape. Below, smaller: Domaine Souleyrol. Note that I am not promoting it, I have not tasted it yet and have no opinion. But let’s say you taste it with friends. And that you love him. How to anchor the experience in your memory to consolidate your bacchanalian culture? Take a photo of the label? Scrupulously remember the name of the domain and that of the cuvée?

In truth, all this will do you nothing. Knowing his name and that he is good is like admiring a star in the sky. It’s pretty, but it doesn’t tell you anything about its position, distance or size. This bottle, it would have been necessary at least to return it, to read the back label. And there, learn: that it is a Ventoux AOC (Rhône valley, challenge for cyclists); that it is based on syrah, grenache and carignan (the latter brings acidity to a typical duo); that it is a 2020 vintage (therefore young).

When you want to learn about wine, you have to prioritize the information, even if the labels do not make it easy for you. First the region of production, then the appellation, then the dominant grape variety, then the vintage. This will give you a snapshot of what this terroir was able to produce that year. And, finally, the name of the domain and that of the cuvée, which you will eventually use to buy some.

2. Because you are still confusing grape varieties and appellations

How do you prioritize correctly when you don’t know what you’re talking about? No, chardonnay is not an appellation. And no, Sancerre is not a grape variety. Do not shrug your shoulders, I have these blunders from the wine merchant installed next to the editorial office. A distinction must be made between grape variety and place of production. Because rare are the grape varieties that only grow on a single appellation, and rare are the appellations that only have one grape variety.

Read also: Article reserved for our subscribers Four misconceptions about grands crus

Note to readers to whom this data seems obvious: French viticulture is vicious. Jurançon is a white wine appellation in Béarn (with Gros and Petit Manseng as the main grape varieties), but Jurançon Noir is a grape variety that grows in Aveyron and produces red wines.

3. Because French appellations are terribly complicated

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