Louis, a father of two, decided to take two months of parental leave when his second child arrived. While he welcomes the extension of paternity leave, announced by Emmanuel Macron on September 23, he believes that it is still not enough.
The government has decided to extend paternity leave to 28 days from July 2021. That is, 6 days of birth leave (paid for by the employer) and 22 days of parental leave, including seven compulsory days. Good news for moms and dads. Until now, paternity leave was only 14 days: 3 days of birth leave and 11 days of parental leave. Many parents were impatiently awaiting this measure.
Extending the duration of paternity leave has been seen as a necessity in recent years. This could indeed reduce inequalities between men and women but also fight against the isolation of mothers and post-partum depression. In addition, thanks to paternity leave, fathers can bond with their baby from the first days of life, as well as find their place with the infant and the mother.
Some families did not wait for this new measure to take longer parental leave. This is particularly the case of Ariane and Louis, parents of two children. When their second baby arrived, Louis decided to take paternity leave for 2 months. He had already extended his paternity leave at the birth of his first child, where he had taken five weeks of paid leave accumulated throughout the year. They tell us why this process was important to them and their family through an interview.
How did you come up with the idea of taking longer paternity leave?
Louis: We discussed it a lot together. At first I was afraid it would be complicated financially, then we quickly found solutions to make it possible. It was really a desire on our part to have a maximum of two to welcome this child.
Ariane: I remember Louis was also influenced a lot by a friend of ours who took six months of paternity leave and it went really well. He loved taking care of his child and he was very happy. So I think Louis's mind caught on. It’s a snowball effect.
Louis: It is true that the value of example and the construction of mentalities is extremely important. It is true that as a working man, you can quickly think that you will be bored changing diapers, not leaving your home. In fact, it is not true, it is a very nice experience.
How did you benefit from this?
Louis: The goal was to be two as long as possible. This leave allowed us to share the daily tasks. For example, I take care of all the meals because Ariane is breastfeeding. In fact, it is not so much to relieve the mother but to be two and face two. What I really enjoyed about my first child, and what I reiterate about the second, is the opportunity to bond with him. In addition, being present from the start allows you to learn a whole host of everyday infant behaviors. I take the example of diapers because this is the most telling, but I know that before I really knew how to put on a diaper, it took me a while. I think this is not at all trivial, and that fathers who have two weeks paternity leave are too quickly plunged back into the world of work. At night when they come home they are tired and they do not take special care of the child. Suddenly they miss these first days when everything is falling into place.
Arianne: This is also what is important, to avoid this syndrome of the mother who will say to her spouse 'leave, I'm going to do it', because she necessarily does it better since she spends more time with the child . On our side, we were able to avoid it from the first child because Louis had taken five weeks. The idea was really to be able to share everything from the start. For the second, the organization is a little different because I am breastfeeding, but Louis takes care of all the logistics of the house. It's really important that he's here. Especially since he's got the oldest one to deal with and we didn't want him to feel neglected when his little brother arrived. The fact that Louis has two months of paternity leave also allows us to have a lot more time for our couple.
On the practical side, was taking a two-month paternity leave complicated?
Ariane: There was the financial aspect to take into account and we couldn't do more, two months is already a luxury. Compensation does not cover all expenses. So we had to save money to benefit from this longer paternity leave. This is not a decision that can be improvised.
Louis: If I could, I would have stopped longer. I had some concerns about my job, but in the end everything went well and it was accepted very well. I didn't have any particular comment. On the other hand, I had to plan for my replacement, so train someone. It still requires planning upstream.
Paternity leave has just been extended to 28 days, what do you think?
Louis: We’ll say that’s a start, but it’s not enough. I think it would take at least a month and a half, two months, because it goes very quickly. What interests me most is the compulsory part of paternity leave. At the moment, only two-thirds of fathers exercise this right. I think that making part of the leave compulsory frees up a number of fathers who would not have taken it in full otherwise. Particularly because in some companies, we will make them understand that this is frowned upon or that they must come back as soon as possible. In addition, in my opinion, it should be as long as maternity leave, if we really want to establish gender equality.
Arianne: It is true that this would avoid the discrimination in hiring, which women between the ages of 25 and 35 can suffer because they know they are going to have children. The extension of paternity leave is also a good thing because it remains a big challenge to take care of a baby on your own after two weeks. It's scary, even more so if you have several children. I am convinced that having the father at home longer will decrease the rate of postpartum depression.