The confrontation between positive and “traditional” education can be a real ordeal for parents. This mom bears the brunt of it every day with her own family…
Positive education is attracting more and more young parents, even if some go to extremes and, without realizing it, set up a rather “limitless” education. Some specialists warn of the dangers of positive education when it is not well practiced, like Carlone Goldman who affirms his position for punishment and against an overly permissive education. The whole thing being ultimately to ensure that the educational model applied is not dangerous for the child. and that it is suitable for parents…
A woman and her partner find themselves confronted with their family because they apply a positive education with their 3 and a half year old son. They find they aren’t tough enough on him as he throws temper tantrums. Distraught, the mother confided in the Mumsnet forum: “My family thinks we should be tougher and yell at our son more because he throws tantrums.” And the young mother does not understand the reproaches that her family makes to her and her partner…
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She prefers a softer approach with her three-and-a-half-year-old son
In her message posted on the Mumsnet forum, the mother explains in more detail what her family blames her for: “The temper tantrums are less than they were a year ago. But it still happens. Everyone in my family just thinks he’s mean now and needs a good punishment. Literally, that’s what they think. Personally, I take a softer attitude. Yelling makes seizures last longer and doesn’t really seem to help. I like to remove the toys, remove him from the situation, come home, give him a time out, turn off the TV, that kind of stuff, rather than just shouting.The mum who is sure of her technique with her son was still taken aback by his family’s remarks and asked for advice. Should she really punish him? Or continue this way?
The mothers who responded to her message mostly supported her in this softer approach to education. The mother explained: “I’ve always implemented this kind of technique: ‘I know you’re frustrated but we have to go now. You were having fun and now we have to go and it makes you sad”. I can’t say it was a huge success but on average the tantrums are shorter.” And the other moms have approved of her technique: “Scream at your family and see if it makes them happier or angrier” It is true that reversing the situation can be a good way for them to understand the young mother’s gentle methods!
Parenting writer
Zoé is on a work-study program, she joined the aufeminin team in September 2022, she writes for the parenting section. Committed and curious, Zoé likes to write to advance…