psychology
4 sentences by which you can recognize immature people
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Maturity and wisdom can be seen in many habits and life decisions, but also in a person’s communication. There are some sentences that we are more likely to hear from immature people than from mature people – like this one.
The older we get, the more mature we are – or so one would think. In reality, however, there are people at every age who are particularly wise and those who are rather immature. Because experience and time are not the only things we need to achieve maturity. We also have to be able to reflect on what we have experienced and be willing to work on ourselves and learn new things. And that’s exactly what some people do better than others. Immature people – regardless of age – can be recognized primarily by their behavior and their statements.
These 4 sentences expose immature people
1. “Why does this always have to happen to me?”
There are external circumstances that we cannot influence, be it illness or the loss of a job. Sometimes things like this happen and we just have to deal with it. However, immature people often tend to see themselves as victims of circumstances. “Why does this always have to happen to me?” or “The world has conspired against me” are sentences that often come from their lips. In doing so, they shirk all responsibility for their lives. Mature people, on the other hand, know that although we cannot influence everything that comes our way, it is entirely within our control how we deal with it.
2. “That’s just how I am.”
Every person has good and bad sides, strengths and weaknesses. Knowing ourselves well enough to know what our flaws are is important and healthy. But simply hurting our fellow human beings without thinking about it and justifying it with the statement “That’s just how I am” shows immaturity. Because that makes it really easy for yourself and avoids taking responsibility for your own actions and for what those actions do to those around you.
3. “I told you straight away.”
“Well, I told you that straight away” – nice, and how exactly is this answer supposed to help me now? Because if I messed up, I usually know it myself. Then I don’t need another person to point out to me that they knew from the start what I should have done differently. Sure: We’ve probably all had a saying like that on the tip of our tongues when someone has ignored our advice. However, maturity and empathy are shown by the fact that we manage to hold back from making the statement in order not to hurt the other person. Because now that doesn’t benefit anyone except our own ego.
4. “All of my exes were toxic.”
In principle, it is difficult to describe people with the buzzword toxic anyway. From the point of view of most psychologists, it is the relationships and dynamics between people that are toxic, not the people themselves. Because immature people blame partners etc. and take responsibility for themselves. This makes it pretty easy for themselves. Mature people, on the other hand, realize that a problem usually involves two people and that it is never just one side to blame for something. They are therefore able to recognize their role in a separation or conflict. Immature people generally do not have this ability to reflect.