Corona diary of a mother: Back to normal – how much “earlier” do we want? “

Corona diary of a mother
Back to normal – how much “earlier” do we want? “

It is evening. We roar home on the main road, it is unusually quiet in the car. Our nine-year-old only groans a little in between. “I have such a headache!” She whimpers. The teen has his head on the baby’s lap in the reboarder and the first grader keeps closing his eyes. When we get home, the six of us immediately fall into bed and feel as though we are encased in lead. You’d think we had a marathon behind us, but we were “only” in the amusement park. The website promised a half-empty park with a safe hygiene concept and clearances. We got crowds that would have robbed us of the last nerve without the corona pandemic. At least that’s what I say, but secretly I ask myself: Have we just been completely effeminate in the last year?

Returning to normal will not be that easy

At the beginning of the pandemic, I somehow still naively thought that there would be that one day when everything would suddenly be normal and good again. It only gradually became clear to me that the return to a normal life would come much more slowly than the pandemic itself. Even a vaccination doesn’t make everything right again, especially if you have (unvaccinated, of course) children. How long will we admonish to keep our distance? How long will it be difficult for us to let our children go to a children’s birthday party? The incidence in our district has already dropped below 25, everything is being opened up here one by one, and yet it is difficult for me to adjust my worries. I still feel like I’m in disaster mode. Right? No idea! I definitely wasn’t ready for the amusement park.

How far do we want our lives back anyway?

Only a few more days, then all children in our district can go back to their normal class. It is lucky that this model of alternating lessons has come to an end, I’m happy about it for myself, but especially for our three schoolchildren. You will finally see all of your friends again and regain the structure that we have all so lacked. On the one hand. On the other hand, I find it kind of hard to know that I will see my children so much less. That we will have less family time than last year. Looking through the rose-colored farewell glasses, the “more” family was not always just too much, but also somehow very cozy. We built a greenhouse, rediscovered old board games, taught the children our favorite games from the past, and recreated the outside world a little bit inside. And yet I have to admit: In the end, all the family time was not compatible with our jobs. It will be different again and that is a good thing.

The pandemic has changed us

But I think, as much as I have longed for a completely normal life: I actually don’t want the former normal anymore. Not because I’m afraid of it, but because we as a family have grown together and matured in a completely different way. There were the horrible and fearful moments, but there were also those when the less felt like more. We consumed less, endured together more, discovered new lovable sides in each other, had to forgive each other a lot and showed each other deep abysses. We hardly had any appointments, many gray days, but also creative ideas, shed tears, laughed together, shared our worries and experienced intimate moments together. There is no reset button and I don’t think we want it either. We will find our way back into social life step by step, but will probably skip a few steps. Because they are no longer good and maybe never have done any good either. But we will enjoy the steps we take like never before. Even if they scare us and then we fall dead into bed. I am really curious what we will say in 30 years if someone asks us what Corona has changed in us. Probably none of us will say “nothing” …

This article originally appeared on Eltern.de.

Barbara