Echoist
Do You Magnetically Attract Narcissists?
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The echoist reflects emotions and views of the environment. This harbors the risk of being exploited. Are you affected too? Find out here!
Echoist: The typical features
The term Echoist is a modification of the word echo, which we also know by the synonym echo. In the case of an echo, a sound is emitted which comes back or echoes in the same way in empty rooms. However, so-called echoism has little to do with singing or music. It’s about a very specific personality structure, which has a special characteristic: echoists take over the behavior, opinions and feelings of others and reflect them in a similar way.
Echoists tend to agree with you in conversations, nod off criticism, and endorse other people’s decisions. There are seldom critical words. And why? Very simple: are echoists sensitive, considerate and very compassionate peoplewho like to stand back for harmony. You definitely don’t want to be a burden to others – putting yourself in the foreground is very uncomfortable for echoists.
Confrontations, differences of opinion, arguments, unpleasant discussions – echoists want to avoid that at all costs. Echoists would rather give in than argue and insist on their rights. According to this description, echoists sound like extremely friendly people, which sometimes just a little too nice are. But this is exactly where a big problem is hidden: their niceness is being exploited.
This is why echoists often end up in unhealthy relationships
Give instead of take: Echoists live this principle fully. Echoists are often very selfless in order to make others happy. However, if they come into contact with a toxic person, it becomes very dangerous to mental health. Since echoists can hardly set boundaries, let them get away with more, give in to problems quickly and look to themselves to blame. And without noticing it first, they ended up with someone who shamelessly exploits their good nature.
Despite the unhealthy partnership (or friendship), echoists keep finding reasons to stay through their enormous compassion. In the long run, your self-esteem will suffer greatly as a result. One group in particular can be dangerous for echoists: the narcissists.
Echoist and narcissist: a match with consequences
The term echoist was used by the scientist Craig Malkin who had done research in the field of narcissism. It struck him that narcissists always end up in relationships with certain people: the echoists.
You’ve probably heard of the so-called narcissists. This is a person who has a (clinically diagnosable) narcissistic personality disorder has developed. Narcissists have an inflated self-image and appear self-loving and engaging to others. They do not tolerate criticism of their person, show no compassion and want to be admired and recognized.
So you could be the narcissist than the exact opposite denote by the echoist. One just wants to give, the other just wants to take – it couldn’t be more different! And yet these opposite characters always end up in a relationship, whether friendly or romantic. How does that fit together?
Why echoists keep coming back to narcissists
Narcissists demand endless compassion, unconditional care, and one hundred percent attention. That corresponds exactly to the selfless, giving nature of echoistswho take care of others warmly and are only too happy to put themselves back. A symbiosis from which both benefit? Not at all – narcissists often act unscrupulously and emotionally exploit echoists.
Because even if echoists like to give – they too need empathy, support, care and consideration. A narcissist who is solely concerned with his own good can never give them that.
Echoist: What Should I Do If I Am One?
As an echoist, you have a lot of empathy. It is easy for you to empathize with other people and empathize with their feelings. What you are missing, however, is what is known as ecpathy. That’s your own Ability to distinguish meant. So the goal is to stay with yourself more in the future so that you can better stand up for your own needs. This means that you run less of the risk of others ignoring, manipulating or taking advantage of you.
The following tips can help:
- Feeling check: Instead of immediately putting yourself in the other person’s position in a situation, you first ask yourself: What do I feel and what do I need now? Try to stay with yourself and not get lost in other people’s emotions.
- Self-esteem update: Your opinion, your feelings and your voice are important. Hone your self-esteem so you don’t feel guilty about standing up for yourself.
- Guilt brake: Echoists have the ability to see their own mistakes. Excellent! But that doesn’t mean you have to be blamed for everything. In the event of a dispute, ask for time to think about it and ask yourself objectively: What part do I play, but where do I see errors in the behavior of the other person? Narcissists are good manipulators – if you are unsure, you can discuss the matter with an outside person.
- Accept conflicts: Even if they are uncomfortable – sometimes differences of opinion are inevitable. Don’t deny your views just to please others – you will hold yourself down and it will only spur narcissists on.
- Bear silence. Narcissists often use a tactic called stonewalling. This is a kind of withdrawal of love that is supposed to keep you down. The narcissist wants to teach you to dance to his tune and expects you to come up to him after he withdraws. Instead, choose to live according to the following mantra: I don’t run after someone who doesn’t treat me well!
By the way: There are different types of narcissism. Covert narcissism is especially dangerous because you don’t recognize it for a long time.
You can also find more topics related to narcissism, satisfaction and personal development in the BRIGITTE Community. Have a look!
Covert sources: psychologytoday.com, psychcentral.com/