Enjoy Phoenix aptly explains why this question is misplaced

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On Instagram, on September 15, Enjoy Phoenix raised a rant against those who ask him "When will the baby?". An important message to put an end to this social pressure.

No, a woman doesn't have to have children. Yes, if she wants it, she is free to decide when in her life. Even today, not wanting to start a family is suspect, as is not having children for 35 years. This social pressure weighs heavily on women who are often asked (not to say, all the time), "When will the baby be?" ". If this question seems harmless to the interlocutor, it nevertheless reflects an archaic way of thinking. That of believing that a woman cannot be fulfilled other than in motherhood. She is also particularly offensive to those who want to be moms, but are unable to.

"Thank you for respecting my choice"

Tired of being asked this question, Marie Lopez, better known under the name of Enjoy Phoenix, actually gave a rant on Instagram on September 15. The blogger aptly explained why asking a woman when she will have a baby is inappropriate:

“3 years since I received this question on the networks. Yet it is not just here that this questioning comes back. At the very heart of my family, older generations wonder why at 25, I am still childless. I know that I am not the only one, and that many will recognize themselves in my words.

Why is this question bothering me? I will try to summarize it:

– Not everyone wants to have children. It is a choice, not an obligation.
– Not everyone CAN have children. You don't know if the person is physically able to conceive, maybe they have been trying for years without success. A person's economic situation is also a determining factor.
– This is not a finality or a goal of life for everyone. “Wedding-house-dog-baby” a utopia for many, but ask yourself why you believe this is the key to happiness. For me, that's what society wants us to believe. But happiness doesn't NECESSARILY reside in this pattern.
– With networks, having a child has become a BUSINESS. The pressure placed on women to give birth also comes from the fact that more and more people exploit their pregnancies and children for buzz and partnerships, therefore, these are images that we see EVERYDAY. A child is not a fashion accessory or a money machine.
With whom ? Should you still feel good in your relationship (or with yourself)

Currently I have chosen to focus on MY LIFE. If I ever have one, I hope it will come about because of what I decided, not because of the pressure. A woman is not a broodmare, she has the right not to want a child. A woman may not have a maternal instinct, she can do whatever she wants with her body, her career, her desires, her life. A woman is no more in her place as a mother.
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Listen to your desires before listening to those of others, especially when it comes to giving birth or not, with all the responsibilities that come with it. Maybe I'll be a mom someday, or maybe not, only time will tell. Thank you for respecting my choice. "

A post very well received by its subscribers. In fact, many Internet users have recognized this social pressure and thanked him for this message. What proves once again that many women suffer from this situation. As Fiona Schmidt puts it so well in her eponymous book: "Let Us Go Uterus".

See this post on Instagram

"When's the baby?" . 3 years since I get this question on the networks. Yet it is not just here that this questioning comes back. At the very heart of my family, older generations wonder why at 25, I am still childless. I know that I am not the only one, and that many will recognize themselves in my words. . Why is this question bothering me? I will try to summarize it: – Not everyone wants to have children. It is a choice, not an obligation. – Not everyone CAN have children. You don't know if the person is physically able to conceive, maybe they have been trying for years without success. A person's economic situation is also a determining factor. – This is not an end or a goal of life for everyone. "Wedding-house-dog-baby" is a dream for many, but ask yourself why you believe this is the key to happiness. For me, that's what society wants us to believe. But happiness does not NECESSARILY reside in this pattern. – With networks, having a child has become a BUSINESS. The pressure placed on women to give birth also comes from the fact that more and more people are exploiting their pregnancies and children for buzz and partnerships, therefore, these are images that we see EVERYDAY. A child is not a fashion accessory or a money machine. – With whom ? Should you still feel good in your relationship (or with yourself). . Currently I have chosen to focus on MY LIFE. If I ever have one, I hope it will be because of what I decided, not because of the pressure. A woman is not a broodmare, she has the right not to want a child. A woman may not have a maternal instinct, she can do whatever she wants with her body, her career, her desires, her life. A woman is no more in her place as a mother. . Listen to your desires before listening to those of others, especially when it comes to giving birth or not, with all the responsibilities that come with it. Maybe I'll be a mom one day, or maybe not, only the future will tell me 👀 Please respect my choice 🙏🏻

A post shared by Marie Lopez (@enjoyphoenix) on Sep 15, 2020 at 9:01 am PDT

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