“I was beaten up in the street one day because I didn’t dress like everyone else. I was told that I was defying God. I was making images, it was a sin”

“I am 16 years old in this photo. A friend took it at my request at home, in Batna, in the Aurès, in Algeria, where I grew up. Batna is a city as dry as rock, full of scars, especially those of the war in Algeria. The photo was taken in October 1989, three years before the first attacks that mourned Algiers. But we already felt the rise of fundamentalism. Batna was beginning to look like Kabul, the garages were transformed into mosques. Everyone was ordered to dress the same, it was the beginning of the djellaba uniform, sneakers and beard. Whereas, I wanted to be different.

At the time, I painted in the spirit of Orientalists, like Chassériau, I liked Rembrandt’s chiaroscuro, I painted my sister like Delacroix. In the photo, I pose as a painter, palette in hand, taking the pose of Velázquez painting The Meninas. The hat I wear was for me a sign of distinction, the mark of my love for the West in all its splendor.

I loved Arthur Rimbaud, Bob Dylan and Charles Baudelaire, with whom I identified. This hat alone cost me dearly. I was beaten up in the street one day because I didn’t dress like everyone else. I was told that I was defying God. I was making images, it was a sin. Painting was a form of resistance for me. I saw myself as a rebel, a dreamer, a sort of wanderer. I wanted to witness the world and challenge preconceived ideas.

“I wanted to devour everything, I had an insatiable curiosity”

Some time after this photo, I joined the school of fine arts in Batna, where I was the youngest student. I still couldn’t imagine leaving my city, where I loved the sumptuous landscapes, the walks with my friends. I was not yet thinking of Algiers, even less of France. I come from a poor family, but my parents have always supported me. Paint like brushes were rare, the material arrived in droplets in Batna and was negotiated expensive, under the coat.

So I found schemes, I did summer jobs. To make money, for example, I painted large illustrations for TV or cassette sellers. I had also become a portrait painter. Despite the difficulties, I knew that I was born an artist, I had confidence in my future. I wanted to devour everything, I had an insatiable curiosity. My ambition at the time was to constantly discover new things. When, at 51, I look at this young man of 16, I say to myself that in truth I have not changed. »