Self-care is not a trend, we need it to be sustainably healthy and happy. These seven pillars can help integrate self-care into everyday life.
There are a variety of myths and interpretations circulating about self-care. Many people associate self-care with a bubble bath including a glass of wine when everything gets too much for them. But is that enough? Such relaxation methods can help in the short term to make us feel better in stressful situations, but in the long term we need more to stay truly healthy – both mentally and physically. If we work day and night, fight lack of sleep with coffee and only get fast food instead of eating something nutritious, then the bathtub and wine cannot solve the problem.
Instead, it would be helpful to look at what we really need in the long term to feel good on all levels. Ultimately, only the person can know what the ultimate self-care concept looks like for each individual. However, the seven pillars of self-care can be helpful clues. They are all equal and ideally should all receive the same attention.
The 7 pillars of self-care for a happy and healthy life
1. Mental self-care
Mental or intellectual self-care primarily refers to the mindset. How we deal with negative thoughts is essential for holistic health. If you constantly think negatively and remain rigid in these old patterns, you will not succeed in many things. Luckily, our brains can be trained. You can do this through mindfulness exercises and meditation, but learning new skills is also important in order to practice curiosity and openness.
2. Emotional self-care
Becoming truly aware of your emotional needs is anything but easy. Only if we manage to allow, understand and process our feelings can we remain mentally healthy in the long term. Repressing it doesn’t get us anywhere. The good news: Dealing with our feelings correctly is a matter of practice. Meditations in which we learn to perceive our thoughts and feelings as neutral observers can be a helpful tool. But if you don’t really know how and where to start, the best way to learn to work with your emotions is through psychotherapy.
3. Physical self-care
Our physical health is the focus here. And yes – physical self-care can certainly take place in the form of the bubble bath mentioned at the beginning. But it definitely doesn’t stop there. Sufficient exercise that suits us and is good for us, a balanced diet that nourishes and fills us, and good and sufficient sleep play an important role. What we tend to forget here are breaks and regular relaxation, because our body also needs these to stay healthy in the long term.
4. Spatial self-care
Here we should first ask ourselves what spatial environment we need in order to feel comfortable. This starts with a bigger picture, such as the country or environment in which we live – or want to live. Do we prefer a warm climate, or do we prefer it cooler? Do we prefer an urban environment with a wide range of cultural offerings or rather nature?
The more we go into detail here, the more we can take immediate action. This form of self-care is also about our own four walls, our place of retreat and the question of how we design it. Order and cleanliness in your own home play an important role. Whether we find it easy or difficult to keep things tidy depends on our personality, but basically everyone benefits from a hygienic and harmonious environment. So it’s best to put away the laundry, do the dishes or change your bed straight away. You’re guaranteed to feel better afterwards!
5. Mental self-care
At first glance, spiritual self-care may seem related to mental self-care. But our mental well-being is also about something bigger, something overarching. The most important question is: What gives our lives meaning?
For some it might be children or an important job with great responsibility. But we can find spiritual fulfillment and meaning in a wide variety of areas of life. What is family or work for one person may be traveling and discovering new cultures for another. The only thing that helps here is radical honesty, which really gives you a sense of purpose.
6. Recreational self-care
Hobbies and other forms of leisure activities are an important part of self-care. In order to be creative and productive, our brain needs breaks. What we enjoy is of course very different. Some people like to be on the move and need constant activity, while others seek conscious relaxation and prefer a good book to constant movement. Listen to yourself here and do what you feel comfortable with. But still think outside the box, because trying something new can give a real boost to your self-confidence.
7. Relationship self-care
Our social environment is fundamental to our well-being. We all need relationships and social connections. Even though there are introverted and extroverted personality types, no one can survive completely without contact with others. That’s why maintaining relationships is also part of self-care. We should spend time with people who are good and inspire us, and avoid toxic people like energy vampires whenever possible.
But social connection is also about balance. Doing something for others is just as important as doing something for ourselves. This could be a call to our aunt that we have been putting off for a while, or we ask the elderly neighbor if we can bring her something from shopping. Promoting social interaction not only feels good – it is also good for us in the long term.
This is how you can use the pillars of self-care for yourself
The most important thing is not to put pressure on yourself. This method is not about developing the perfect plan within a few hours on how to keep each of the pillars at the optimal level at all times. Because for some points it can take years – and that’s completely okay. Rather, the seven pillars are intended to be a basic framework that can help us when we have the feeling that our lives are out of control in one or more areas.
One possibility would be to set one of the fields for each day of the week. Maybe it works better for you to shift your focus on a weekly or even monthly basis. Which topics require how much work is also very individual. While some people find it easy to maintain their relationships, others have difficulty doing so. There are people who are naturally good at taking care of their physical well-being, but easily lose sight of their emotional and mental health.
All pillars are connected to each other. If we work on one, the others ultimately benefit too. This is a question of measure and time. So it’s best to look intuitively in which area you see the most urgent need for action – based on this, you can develop your very own self-care routines.
Sources used: theblissfulmind.com, simplyganzleben.de