A no to a marriage proposal? You have to cope with that first! But as these stories show: It's not the end of the world …
Most people find it difficult to say no – even (or especially?) To a marriage proposal. Still, we should do it when our heart tells us to, because a dishonest yes often does more harm than an honest no. On "Reddit" numerous men have shared stories about the no to the no – the no to a marriage proposal – and how it went after this experience for the applicant, the no-sayer and the relationship. May these stories illuminate us a little and give us wisdom so that we can make more prudent decisions in the future and, if our feelings suggest it, say no more confidently.
No to the application – and then what? Eight men tell
1. All good things …
"My mother said no to my father three times. After the third time, he went to a bar, got drunk, and poured his heart out to everyone who listened to him. It was a very small place in the Italian Alps, my father spoke hardly any Italian and the villagers, including my mother, spoke little English. When my mother found out that a sad American was sitting in the village pub, she went to him and agreed to marry him.
Last month my parents celebrated their 44th wedding anniversary. "
2. When a door closes …
"My partner was an art student and I just joined the Army. We'd been together since high school. I asked her for her hand, she said no. She wanted to graduate first. We stay friends for a while, but we haven't been in touch now more. I think she works in a bar right now. I later married my best friend. We've been married ten years now and have a five year old son. "
3. Until death …
"My mother turned down my father's proposal when they were younger. Not because she didn't love him, but because she was unsure whether marriage was something she wanted and not something society expected or expected of her So. They stayed together anyway and had children (that's why you're reading this right now!).
Then, when my father became fatally ill a few years ago, my mother gathered her courage and asked for his hand. In order to take revenge on her, he said no – before accepting her offer a few days later.
He died a happy man. "
4. Sudden enlightenment
"We met in her homeland in Germany, I was traveling back then. I knew it was love. We had a long-distance relationship for a while. I flew to Europe, she to the USA. I suggested that we get married so that we could be together She said no a couple of times. I didn't press her, stayed patient or stressed her. I knew she was worth waiting. One day she realized that we could be together like this. If we got married, we could we live in the same country. Now, a few years later, I'm still married to my best friend and live with her in Germany. Not all no's stay no. Life goes on. "
5. Often you only know what you have in something when it is no longer there
"Here is my parents' story: My father asked my mother several times to marry him. She said no – several times. One day he asked her again – and she said YES! He panicked, fled her apartment and separated from her Three weeks later he hated his life without her and begged her to take him back and marry. Nine months later the wedding was and their marriage lasted 16 years until my mother died of cancer. The two loved each other so much and felt one Such deep appreciation for one another. It was 25 years since my mother died. My father never remarried. No one will ever be able to replace my mother even remotely. "
6. Stupid for B … but there is a reason for everything!
"My friend A was together with his girlfriend B for years, so he decided to propose to her. What he didn't know: B wanted to propose to him too … A asked first and B went crazy because she already had her proposal and bought a ring. She said No. For the next few weeks, B went even more freaky and didn't answer A's calls or messages.
A then decided to spend the money he had saved on a plane ticket to Europe. What was supposed to be a three-month trip through Western Europe turned into a one-year trip around the world.
One day A announces that he will be back and B decides to wait for him at the airport and ask for his hand there. But it turns out that A met a woman in Peru, whom he immediately fell in love with and who married her in Peru.
A good five years later, A and his Peruvian wife are still happily married and recently had a baby. To this day, B hasn't fully forgiven herself for ruining her relationship with A. "
7. Off to new shores
"After her no, I never saw her again. Less than a year later I met my current wife. We have been together for 15 years."
8. Happy ending
"After she said no, we stayed together for another six years – until she changed her mind and asked me to ask her again. We were then engaged for a year and married in 1991. We are married to this day, have three children and are still in love . "