Inka Bause reveals
This is how I know that two people belong together
Some people seem made for one another. But how do you recognize a perfect match? Moderator and love messenger Inka Bause has an idea.
He should have a certain gender, hobbies that harmonize with mine, but ideally can also offer a balance to our relationship, he can be a maximum of six and a half years older and under no circumstances smaller than me, our humor must necessarily be similar, as well as our intellect and level of education and very important of course is this instant spark, which ignites fireworks right at the beginning, which then starts all over again every few months. Anyone who starts thinking about how the right person should be, who deserves to be shared with him, may quickly have a whole catalog of criteria that the Perfect Match would have to meet.
In fact, many psychologists also seem to assume that certain characteristics can be used to predict how well two people fit together and whether they are made for each other – at least the TV format “Are You The One” is based on this assumption, as is some dating -Apps that make a preselection for their users on the basis of mere data and information from potential partners. And last but not least, there are also studies that suggest that people with certain similarities or matching traits have better chances of a long-term partnership than others.
Is Love Really Based On Data? That’s what Inka Bause says
But is that really the secret of love? Do we “just” need to consult the right set of information to know whether or not two people are meant for each other? We asked the “Bauer sucht Frau” presenter and “Zweisam” godmother Inka Bause how she recognizes a match. Since the Leipzig woman took over the moderation of the RTL dating show in 2005, she has observed numerous couples getting to know each other, getting together or simply not matching. And lo and behold: According to her, there is apparently another method than data comparison to identify love potential and relationship compatibility between two people.
“If one person talks a lot to me about the other, that is always the basic requirement and a first indication that something is there,” says Inka, based on her many years of experience from “Farmer Seeks Wife”. The way in which someone speaks about the person concerned is often a clear signal: Is there something enchanted to be recognized, enthusiasm, tenderness? Then we have a clear indication of a connection. But the expert only provides clearer signs when a couple is together.
“The decisive factor for me is the energy that exists between two people,” says Inka. “When two souls are in harmony with each other, you can feel it, and you can tell by the color of their faces, the shine in their eyes, their posture.” According to her, what matters is not the number of ticks we can tick on any checklist, but the feeling – and this applies not only to us as outsiders when we observe a couple, but also to our own connections . “As a rule, we can already feel in the first few seconds whether or not something connects us to a person. We have just forgotten how to listen,” says the expert. And maybe the reason is that we’ve got used to trusting data rather than our own feelings.