Oh yes, there are these people who simply exude an aura of resentment. Be it the morning grouch in the office, who doesn't get a friendly word before lunch break, the grumpy grandma from the apartment next door or the annoyed family member – for some people, communication is simply not fun.
Unfortunately, as is so often the case, you may not be able to change the other person. And responding to the provocation and flinching back rarely has a constructive effect. We reveal how you deal with difficult conversation partners instead.
1. Try to understand
Sounds pretty stupid at first. But often helps to curb your own annoyance with the snazzy turn on. Who knows what just happened to the other one? Maybe the cashier at the supermarket checkout had to skip the break because there was so much to do; maybe the colleague is facing an important meeting and that is why he is so tense. Or the other person just had a bad day – happened! Which leads us to point 2 …
2. Don't take it personally
Of course, this advice applies especially to people you don't know or only know fleetingly. The barista at the coffee shop or the musty bus driver can basically not matter to you – you probably are too. So if they take their displeasure at you: The best thing to do is forget them again.
3. Think: What do you want?
It's inevitable, but you know you need to talk to this one person and talk to her? Make a plan beforehand! Facing a bad-tempered person is easier if you have carefully considered what you want beforehand. If the conversation drifts off, always come back to it – very factually.
4. Answer option a: "I understand you"
Even if it is difficult: signal sympathy to your counterpart. In the best case scenario, this will take away the target. If you have different opinions, make it clear that it may be a subjective assessment: "I recognize your opinion" or "I can understand that you are dissatisfied".
5. Body language
Crossed arms or a turned body signal rejection. With a relaxed posture and by "imitating" the gestures of your counterpart, you send subliminally positive signals. Because: If we like someone, we often unconsciously imitate their movements. Of course, we are not talking about wild gestures, but leaning on your elbow on the table, grasping it through your hair, crossing your legs …
6. Answer option b: "Bye!"
With all understanding – you don't have to put up with everything. If you are a customer, for example, or in your own family: the person you are talking to cannot afford everything. And it can sometimes help to resolve the situation, especially when the mood is very hot. On the nice ("I think I'll be back later") or the hard way ("I don't want to have the conversation this way – for me the dialogue is over here").
And the best thing to remember is that one of you two is already in a bad mood. It would be a shame if you let yourself be infected – in the end, instead of one person, there are only two bad guys on it.