stare effect
Why do I feel like I’m being watched?
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Most of us know this: somehow we can’t shake the feeling that someone is watching us. So does that mean we’re paranoid?
On the street, on the bus or in the doctor’s waiting room: there are situations that are predestined for observing people. But what if you feel like someone else is scrutinizing you – all the time? You can’t see the person, but you just feel that someone is looking at you.
Psychologists speak of the so-called staring effect. This phenomenon has been known in science for a long time. In a study from 1913, for example, the psychologist John E. Coover examined the extent to which we can really sense when someone is looking at us. However, the result showed that in most cases it was pure coincidence that someone correctly noticed whether a person was watching him/her or whether he/she just felt it.
So the big question about the staring effect is: Are you really being watched, or is it a subjective misperception, i.e. do you just have the feeling that someone is looking at you intently – but it’s really not like that? These options can have very different causes.
Possible reasons for the stare effect
1. You stand out visually
The most obvious reason why people look at you frequently is the simplest: you are an attractive person who has a positive vibe. That now draws attention to itself. But also a striking appearance in other areas – you are very tall or short, have a very distinctive face, brightly colored hair or bright clothes – can ensure that others often look in your direction.
2. Don’t look at me!
However, the subjective feeling of being observed can also be due to the opposite. If you are very shy or even suffer from social anxiety, you probably dread being looked at. You would prefer to disappear into the background, your fear of rejection and ridicule is great. And because you resent the idea of being the center of attention so much, you fall prey to the misperception that it really is.
3. You suffer from paranoid traits
In the worst case, the staring effect can also be caused by a mental illness, such as a paranoid personality disorder. Those who suffer from this are often extremely suspicious and assume, for example, that others only want their worst. It can also make a person think they are being watched all the time. If this affects you or someone close to you, it would be wise to seek professional help.
What helps against the feeling of being watched?
In case number one, that is: You are really being watched because you attract the attention of others, there is not much that can be done about it. Of course, if it’s your personal styling that draws attention – like your clothes or your hairstyle – you would have the option to change it if you were uncomfortable with the attention.
And in cases two and three, it can definitely help to talk to a psychologist or doctor about the topic. In this way, you can evaluate together which strategies and measures are best suited to alleviate your suffering and to help you in specific situations.
Notice: This article contains general advice only and should not be used for self-diagnosis or treatment. It cannot replace a visit to a doctor or a psychologist, which is why we strongly recommend that you seek professional help.
Sources used: psychologytoday.com, gedankenwelt.de