TikTok has become the place to approach sex education, thanks in particular to the interventions of experts in the field. Jennifer Lincoln, Obstetrician-Gynecologist, delivers sex “lessons” on the app. And the latest on the concept of virginity has not gone unnoticed.
Known for speaking out on social media and debunking sexual health myths, Obstetrician-gynecologist Jennifer Lincoln has started an important conversation about virginity. “Losing your virginity: what does it mean?” “Asks the expert in a video liked more than 60,000 times. She encouraged her followers to share their responses in the comments, and the responses were revealing. One of the followers writes for example: “The loss of virginity is the first time we consent to 100%”, while another comments “The term ‘lose’ implies that it has value. But this is not necessarily something to preserve or keep if you don’t want to ”. Still others explain that it’s up to everyone to make their own definition.
A misrepresentation of virginity
“Well, there is no single answer to what it is to lose your virginity”, answers Dr. Lincoln straight away in his video. She goes on to list different examples, such as “Maybe it’s having vaginal sex” and ” [ou] maybe for you it’s having anal sex ”. “But what about women who have sex with women? Should we consider them as virgins forever? I mean, I don’t think they would agree. There is no single scientific definition of “loss of virginity”. And there is no “virginity test” either: your marriage does not say anything about your virginity. Virginity is a social construct, and not a really useful term, is it? “, says the gynecologist.
Indeed, for centuries, the hymen has been presented as a pledge of female virginity. A belief today recognized as having no scientific basis, and which has largely contributed to the spread of the virginity test, considered to be a violation of human rights by the World Health Organization. The hymen proves nothing and does not correspond to any anatomical reality. Because, contrary to popular belief, not all women have a hymen. And above all, it does not necessarily tear during the first sexual intercourse.
Read also : This mother teaches her five daughters that “the first time” isn’t that important
Virginity, a stigmatizing social construction
“I often get questions from frightened teenagers who want to know if they are still considered virgins if they have done a certain activity. Why ? Because society is obsessed with virginity and the idea that it indicates purity, which means you are dirty if you are no longer a virgin ”, said Jennifer Lincoln during a interview given to BuzzFeed. “The questions range from ‘if just the tip of the penis goes in, or just goes in for a second, or if it’s just oral sex – does that matter?” And my answer is always the same: there is no definition of virginity and your worth is SO MUCH more important than society’s obsession with cultivating purity ”.
If Jennifer Lincoln’s speech is so important, it’s because it questions the notion of virginity. Does sex necessarily involve penetration? Does a lesbian “lose” her virginity? Virginity erases all experiences of asexual, homosexual, queer, bisexual and heterosexual people coming out of the phallocentric sexual norm of the penis in a vagina. Finally, it is a social construct reflecting the mores of a patriarchal society: while men are encouraged to lose their virginity early in order to “be up to it”, women are under social pressure to maintain this form of “purity” on the whole. as long as possible.
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Marion Dos Santos Clara
Lifestyle journalist, Marion writes on topics related to psychology, love and sexuality, from a societal perspective. From female pleasure to new methods of personal development, …