relationship
So many ex-sex partners are optimal according to the survey
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Does someone’s sexual past play a role in deciding whether to enter into a relationship with that person? According to a survey: yes.
Our past shapes us whether we like it or not. The experiences we gain, the mistakes we make, the people who disappoint or excite us – everything we experience shapes our characters, habits and behaviors. Still, most people are of the opinion: Judging someone based on their past is unfair, superficial and sometimes not even possible.
And that’s true, it doesn’t work either, because we can hardly predict how exactly a specific life story will shape a certain person. What may make one person strong, confident, and loyal can make another suspicious, selfish, and corrupt. But as much as we try to be impartial and try to ignore a person’s past and to form an impression based solely on their actions in the here and now, we often find it difficult. Not only when it comes to entrusting someone with an apartment or a job, but also when the space by our side is available. According to a survey, at least the number of past sexual partners seems to play a role for many people when choosing a partner.
Survey shows: two to three ex-partners: inside are ideal
The British psychology professor Andrew Thomas and a small research team asked a manageable test group of 188 test subjects to assess how likely they would be to enter into a partnership with a person who …
- is still a virgin
- so far only one: n sex partner: in had,
- two to three
- 19 to 22,
- more than 60
- and some options in between.
In total, the scientists gave the respondents 16 alternatives to choose from, which they were allowed to rate on a scale from 1 (relationship potential very unlikely) to 9 (relationship potential very likely). The researchers were particularly interested in two questions: How many sex partners are perceived as too many? Do men and women assess the sexual past of potential partners differently?
With regard to the first question, the result suggests that in the past there may have been one: s possible life partner: in apparently not only too many, but also too few sex partners: the test subjects’ answers provided a curve corresponding to an agreement value started from 6 for virgins, then on theirs The highest value of almost 8 climbed for people who already had two or three sex partners, and from there it continuously decreased: from a still strong 7 for people with four ex-partners to a 2 for particularly open-minded people who have already had 60 or more sexual relationships.
As for the second question, i.e. whether men and women make different demands on the sexual past of their: s potential partner: in, this study showed only a negligible difference. The male respondents showed a slightly higher tolerance of a more vivid past, but the curves for both sexes were very similar.
What does that tell us now?
With 188 people surveyed, the test group is small, but the result shows a tendency that is only partially surprising: The more sex partners a person and possible life partners have in front of us, the more difficult it is likely for us to classify him as loyal and trustworthy. If he: she has not grown old with any of the past 74 people, why should he: she want it with us?
Then, on the other hand, the question then arises, why don’t virgins do best? Perhaps the lack of experience bothers you? Andrew Thomas suspects that our Stone Age brain could play a role here: If a person has not yet had any success with other sexual partners, they are obviously not perceived as particularly attractive or there may be something wrong with them. From an evolutionary point of view, he is: the ideal partner: for us, not only trustworthy and loyal, but above all physically fit and fertile.
How good that, in addition to an interest in the sexual past of our partners, evolution has also endowed us with rose-colored glasses. After all, when in doubt, it lets us ignore one or the other little thing when we are in love, so that in most cases we can get to know people before we ignore them from the outset because of too many or fewer ex-relationships. And if during this meeting it turns out that most things fit between us, the number of past sexual partners will certainly no longer be able to divide us, despite stone age brains.
Source used: psychologytoday.com