Even if the coronavirus and its increasing involvement in France worries us, there is no question of panicking and even less in front of children. For them too, living this situation is complicated and they need clarification and explanations. Here is how to approach the subject with rationality and adopting the right tone.
Stéphanie Fourneraut, child psychologist, gives us her tips for adopting the right tone, the right words and informing children without worrying.
The coronavirus caught us all a bit off guard. The threat was far away and, until recently, it seemed that we were almost untouchable. Instead, in a matter of days, it radically changed our way of life, be it friendly, family and even at work..
But in the middle of it all, how are the kids How do they live this situation? What do they think? What did they understand this from what was really going on?
Taken by our adult concerns, let's not lose sight of the feelings of our little ones who, despite their age, are often able to understand more than we can imagine … But also sometimes to imagine more than we can understand.
No school, parents who no longer go to work in the morning, more visits to Granny's, more birthdays with friends … a radical life change that is worrying … or at least questioning.
Some Tips for Talking to Children
Explaining to children what is happening in clear language without sensationalism is possible.
- Make sure in advance that you have sufficient, but above all accurate, information , coming only from reliable sources.
- Avoid an overload of notions which could cause confusion, anxiety and, therefore, fear.
- To answer the questions, try to don't go into too much detail .
- Also, don't forget monitor their behavior , to be vigilant in the face of sudden manifestations of anxiety , either it's about psychosomatic reactions or unusual behaviors. What matters is to try to alleviate their possible fears.
- Remind them of the barrier gestures, the preventive measures to adopt and which allow them, at their level to participate in limiting the evolution of the virus.
Stéphanie Fourneraut completes "We start with explain to children actually in clear and transparent language what is a virus, for the little ones we can explain that it is a kind of little beast that gives a disease that can be nasty, that you can catch it, that for most people it doesn't matter but it can happen that it does, especially for people who are already sick or the elderly … and that’s why we’re not going to be able to go see grandpa and grandma for a while.
We must not go into too much detail but clearly explain that to avoid everyone catching it, the government (through the voice of the president) decided to close the schools because thechildren are often not sick but can transmit the virus. And that from now on, we are asked to stay at home as much as possible so as not to spread the virus, because it is the only way to protect the entire population. "
"Moreover, completes the specialist, it is necessary avoid leaving television or radio lit with news that is particularly anxiety-provoking, even for us adults. "
Explain and put in place rules
During this period of confinement at home, it is important to organize for the peace of mind of all. The psychologist insists "It is important to explain that this is not a vacation and therefore to respect almost the same rhythm as when there is school, especially for bedtime. And punctuate the day with activities for the little ones, school work for the older ones. This rhythm will reassure the children. And also allow parents to better manage their telework. It is therefore good to set up rules, mom and dad are working during this time to plan activities or a little screen time but quality. This rhythm of life at home will reassure the child.
We must also be positive about this time at home together, yes it will be a long time not being able to go out but we will do activities, we will share moments of games, movies, why not small gym sessions, readings , cooking …. Many sites offer free activities and access during this period like Bayam. "
Viruses, confinement, my child is particularly anxious, how to react?
The fact that we talk about illness refers to the fear of death, children are sensitive to it at different levels. Around 3/4, they realize that death exists, even if they are not aware that it is irreversible. Around 7/8 years old, they understand that when you die it is forever and that it can happen to your loved ones. We must reassure the children, explain to them that indeed there are people who die after catching this virus, but that in large majority it was people already sick or very old, and that we must respect the gestures barriers and safety instructions to avoid being sick.
"The child's anxiety can be manifested by difficulty falling asleep, waking up at night, restlessness, or by psychosomatic manifestations such as stomach ache for example. It is necessary to reassure, to make them explain if they can what makes them afraid, and to explain that by staying at home we are protected and we also protect others and that if we follow the instructions it will allow reduce the transmission of the virus and therefore be able to resume normal life in a few weeks.
Above all, do not dramatize because this is what will create anxiety in children. Let's try to explain to our children that it is important to follow the instructions given to us, and that they do not worry because we are together at home. If parents are stressed and anxious, children will absorb their emotions. If there is a professional cause, for example, explain it to the children: "I worry about my job" and reassure the child that we are going to find solutions, that these are big problems and that he has nothing to do with them. "
The toolbox to help you broach the subject with children
1- A small video to reproduce at either which can help explain the virus and contagion to the little ones
© Facebook – Valokuvaaja Ari Mäkiö
2- A comic strip well explained and completely adapted to older children
3- Some sources to find really reliable information
Government site on Coronavirus
The website of the Ministry of Solidarity and Health
WHO Coronavirus site
Read also
Coronavirus: how to protect my child?
Coronavirus: Financial aid systems set up for parents whose children are deprived of school
Wash your hands well, things that work with children
Out of ideas? 8 easy recipes kids love
Thanks to Stéphanie Fourneraut